.: How to Attract Personal Happiness
Category:Home / Personal Development / Happiness
Copyright 2006 Margaret Stead
The 'Golden Rule' occurred in the Greek and Chinese cultures thousands of years before the Christian era: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." The spirit of the Golden Rule is one of generosity and altruism and is at the heart of any personal networking and 'right' living. Ralph Waldo Emerson said 'To have a friend, you have to be one', and his words are as true today as they ever were.
You can test this out yourself by completing the following simple exercise:
List ten people you know best: 1 - 10
After each name, write an 'H' if the person is happy, or an 'N' if the person is not happy. (H/N S/N) Then write an 'S' if the person is selfish or a 'U' for unselfish. Rimland in Psychological Reports (51); Brain/Mind Bulletin 1983 defines 'selfish' as:
"A stable tendency to devote one's time and resources to one's own interests and welfare - an unwillingness to inconvenience oneself for others."
In his experimental study, the 2000 individuals who completed this exercise reported very few individuals who were both happy and selfish. The findings represent an interesting paradox.
Selfish people are, by definition, those whose activities are devoted to bringing themselves happiness. Yet at least as judged by others, these selfish people are far less likely to be happy than those whose efforts are devoted to making others happy.
So the Golden Rule in networking, as in life, is if you think about the other person rather than yourself, not only is that going to increase your empathy and rapport skills but it will make you a much more attractive person to know and be a magnet for personal happiness.
Another vital part of your networking skills is your ability to build rapport quickly and effectively with others. Successful rapport building will attract others to you and in turn attract personal happiness.
To build rapport successfully with another individual you need to understand 'where' they are coming from and have 'empathy' with them.
People often think of empathy as a mystical commodity, a special, almost uncanny ability to experience the thoughts and feelings of someone else. In fact 'empathy' is quite simply applied imagination and only requires a little exertion and discipline.
The next time you are sitting in a room conversing with three or more people, try this very simple activity:
Temporarily remove yourself from the conversation. Be very quiet for a few moments. Pay particular attention to the person doing the most talking.
Imagine the following things: Imagine the physical sensations the speaker is experiencing.
Mentally place yourself in that person's body, sitting or standing in a particular position, eating the same food, drinking the same drink.
Mentally become that person. Do you feel energised? Tired? Irritated?
Imagine what kind of day the speaker has had - using all your knowledge about the speakers' day. If you know little about the person, guess.
Continue to imagine yourself as that person. How does your day colour and affect what you are saying? Imagine the person's relationship's to everyone in the room - including yourself.
Continue to mentally be that person. What kind of feelings are generated by the people around you? How do they affect the things you say?
Now step back into yourself and rejoin the scene. Does your own role in the conversation feel different? Empathy, like memory is a creative act, not a mystical property and it requires imagination and practice.
It lies within the grasp of all of us.
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Margaret Stead - Positive Psychologist, Career, Executive and Dream Architect Coach, helps individuals, executives and business leaders achieve their goals and experience genuine fulfilment with their work and career choices.
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.: New Happiness Articles
1). Happiness Takes Work: 5 Choices to Create Happiness
All of us have met people who just seem to be happy most of the time. Perhaps you have assumed that these people are just naturally happy, or that they are the lucky people who have an easy life, or they had really loving parents. Most of the time, nothing could be farther from the truth.
Happy people are making specific choices regarding their thinking and behavior.
2). How to Attract Personal Happiness
Copyright 2006 Margaret Stead
The 'Golden Rule' occurred in the Greek and Chinese cultures thousands of years before the Christian era: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." The spirit of the Golden Rule is one of generosity and altruism and is at the heart of any personal networking and 'right' living. Ralph Waldo Emerson said 'To have a friend, you have to be one', and his words are as true today as they ever were.
3). New Year's Resolutions? Don't Be So Hard On Yourself
Have you set resolutions for yourself to accomplish in 2006? Maybe you want to get more exercise, eat healthier, or spend more time with your family. If you're in business for yourself, maybe you are thinking about hiring a bookkeeper, working fewer hours, or beefing up your marketing plan. All of those things are very good goals, but how do you really feel about them? If you're like me, you probably think that you need resolutions, and furthermore, you have to accomplish all of them in order to be successful.
4). Pause - Yield - Choose: Your Three Powers for Happiness and Vitality
Copyright 2006 Tom Russell
When I was a young man of seventeen I learned to fly airplanes. My first flight as a student pilot taught the value of the PAUSE.
On my very first lesson the instructor put me at the controls. Great tension possessed me as we lifted off and I wrestled the plane up to an altitude of a few thousand feet. All of a sudden Wally said to me, "Tom, the airplane was made to fly itself.
5). How To Increase Self Confidence
Are you looking into ways to help you to gain more confidence? Have you a lack of self-belief? Do you think that you are a weak person? Would you like to be more care-free person? If you have answered yes to any of these questions, this article may well be worth a read. I am going to write about how people can go about increasing their self-confidence.
6). Tend To Your Own Happiness
Many of us wish for more happiness. We want to lead happier, more fulfilling, lives, but the sad truth is that so many of us that wish for more happiness spend much more time tending the happiness of others than we do tending to our own happiness.
Happiness does not simply happen. A person does not suddenly stumble across happiness. Happiness is the result of careful tending and a person who wishes to be happy must tend to their own happiness.
7). The Quest For A Happy Life
Would you consider yourself to be a happy person? Are you seeking ways which could you to have a happier life? I am a person who basically is after a very simple and happy life. I do not crave fast cars, I do not wish to live in a huge mansion, I do not need to have lavish and expensive holidays abroad each year. In this article, I describe the type of lifestyle that would and does bring joy and happiness to my life.
.: Top Happiness Articles
1). The Secret to Happiness and Maslow’s Hierarchy.
“The secret to happiness is contentment”
(Dali Lama)
If we are content with what we have, and where we are, then we are happy.
This means not grasping for attainment of material objects or even spiritual understanding, but being content and just allowing life to happen.
How does this help us to achieve the things we “want”?
I’m glad you asked! This brings me to Maslow’s theory on the hierarchy of human “needs”, the answer to that question is revealed within the following explanation and its accompanying story.
2). The Power of Positive Thinking.
Welcome to the bridge of Manifest life. Don' t let any situation take the control. You are the second master of the game, under the universe master law, what you think is what you get. Can that be possible?
Yes it can be, you got to be in a manifesting state, your mind, your body is one, not two.
The flow of energy that is rotating in the universe can break you if you are not going in the right direction.
3). "Secrets of a Positive Attitude"
Greetings self help reader,
Are you constantly bombarded by thoughts of negativity? Plagued by feelings of insecurity? Do you see everything in a negative manner? The reason for this lies deep within your heart. You are what you mentally and spiritually eat. If a person drinks alchohol on a daily basis, odds are their body will be affected in some way.
4). Happiness – Simple Tips To Achieve It Easily!
Happiness is hard to define but most people are unaware of whether they are happy or not.
Many people believe that happiness is a form of luck and that some people are destined to be happy while others are destined never to be happy.
The good news is we can all be happy if we want to – This is important!
If you want to be happy you can be and it does not take much effort, just a change of attitude.
5). An Introduction to Super Mantra Gayatri
Gayatri Mantra is supreme amongst all Mantras because it bestows its devotees with a pure and focused intellect. According to Chandogya Upanishad, this entire cosmos is Gayatri-manifest. According to India’s great philosopher Adi Shankaracharya Gayatri is a direct manifestation of non-dual (Advaita) Brahman (God or cosmic consciousness). Any spiritual aspirant who understands and imbibes the deep imports of Gayatri meditation/devotion ‘conquers’ the entire cosmos (refer to Brihadaranyak Upanishad).
6). Free Tips To Increase Self Confidence
1. DRUNK!
At the age of sixteen I was invited out for the evening on a Saturday night to celebrate a friend’s birthday. This for most people would be something to look forward to, for me it was something to dread. Socialising and ordering drinks for somebody who has a stutter is bad enough, but I regularly seemed to bare the brunt of the evening’s jokes about me height, weight and occasionally my bald patch.
7). You CAN Shift Your Reality to Include More of What You Want
Do you know that you are emitting signals that the universe responds to? It's like we're all emitting radio signals that go out into the universe and match us up with anything on the same wavelength, bringing to us the circumstances and events which make up our lives.
The signals you emit are made up of your thoughts, beliefs, and the emotions that these create within you.